Dawn (crackofdawn) wrote,
Dawn
crackofdawn

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Livid...

So, today when I got up my 'friend' W called and asked me to go out for breakfast with him (granted, it was in the afternoon, but for us, that is breakfast time :P). I reminded him that most places don't have much (if anything) that I can eat. He said we'd find something, so I agreed. We met at L's place, and after a lot of fucking around, going to W's place to do something, then back to L's and so on (somewhere in there we picked up T), we headed out to look for somewhere to eat. It was then about 4:30. So finally they decided to go to Morrison's (or something like that), which I figured there wouldn't be anything I could eat, but, hey, that was okay. I don't mind just having a drink and hanging out with people who's company I enjoy. It was all good. Until W decided to start ragging on me for being a vegan and telling me how annoying it is to him that he can't take me out anywhere, blah blah blah. Then L and T joined in, and I ended up sitting there, sipping my water being given shit for... what? Trying to be healthy? Living my life the way I want to? Being happy with my lifestyle choice and inconveniencing my friends by DARING to cut foods out of my diet which they consider important, making it so I can't always eat with them?

What the fuck? Where the FUCK do they get off? I told them I was happy. I've lost a little weight and am now back where I was before I moved out on my own. I feel good about myself. I'm eating more, but it's all good for me. I have energy now. I LOVE the food I eat. I'm learning to cook for my diet. I don't plan on being like this forever, or even that long (I think once I get around to joining a gym I may just become a vegetarian again, because then I can exercise and stay healthy). It's not like W even really takes me out anywhere. He has no money. I always pay for his dinners. I don't mind, he's a friend. But don't make me feel bad because I don't take you out as much. Eating out isn't healthy, anyway.

I refuse to count calories. I refuse to weigh myself. I refuse to obsess about size. I just want to be at a place where I can feel healthy and happy about myself. And the fact that two of the people telling me I'm not healthy are quite overweight just pisses me off. Look after yourself before you tell me I'm not eating well.

And I AM. That's what's annoying. I spend VERY little on food now, because I can't eat out. I cook all my meals and eat about five small meals a day (though sometimes, like last night, I eat more then I should... tummyache :P). And they're all good for me. Like salads and potatoes and tomatoes and bread with peanut butter or hummus. I make sure I get what I need. I don't drink pop. I don't eat junk food.

Then their meals came and the smell of the meat made me want to vomit. I decided that I didn't need to waste my time being yelled at and smelling smells which make me sick. I think I only crave meat when I can't actually smell it :-)

So I left and bought some veggies on my way home.

Going to have a yummy vegan dinner and try to calm down before one of them calls me. I don't want to yell at them :P

Okay, just all pissed off. I'll stop ranting.
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